Stefani's most-fantastical-reads book montage

Crooked Kingdom
Six of Crows
Yellow Brick War
The Wicked Will Rise
Charm & Strange
Their Fractured Light
These Broken Stars
Big Little Lies
I'll Be There
Red Queen

Stefani's favorite books »

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Everything it's cracked up to be....

Pregnancy, that is. Today is a pretty big day - I'm 11 weeks and no longer considered "high risk" because we heard a good, strong heartbeat last night at our appointment. The doctor said that from here on out we will be treated like a "normal" (haha) pregnancy. Once a month appointments and our big ultrasound at 21 weeks. I can't even explain how happy I am to hear that things are going well, baby is healthy, and so far - everything looks great...


That still leaves me with debilitating morning sickness, heartburn, bloat and gas that is undescribable (lucky for you), funky pains, exhaustion beyond belief, and the need to pee at least 100 times a day... Add to that the INSANE hormones and you have one messed up little pregnant person. I cried on my way to work today... why, you ask? Oh, because I had to wave goodbye to Derek on my way out - don't ask why that made me cry, just go with it. My students seem to be getting less independent as the year goes on... I am painfully aware of how many times I get asked the EXACT SAME question each day - and when I got in my car last night, I screamed and banged my fists on the steering wheels (totally looked like a scene from "The Whole Nine Yards")...

So you would think that I would call one of the 5 pregnant people I know who are due right around the same time as me and vent to them, or at least make sure I'm not crazy. But I don't - I feel like I'm all alone in this and like nobody understands. More than anything, I want to be with my parents (and I will at the end of the month, if I haven't been committed by then...) Parents take care of you in a way that nobody else can... I can't describe it any other way. This is one of the first times in my life that I really REALLY wish I had a sister - someone close to me that I could be honest with about how I'm feeling. I have always loved that I was an only child but now, I feel like I'm missing something. Derek tries to understand but he's not going through this the way I am - and half the time, I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm crazy... :/

I don't know why I'm writing this - I guess I needed to say it somewhere... now that my venting is complete, I should go get some work done... adios.

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