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Stefani's most-fantastical-reads book montage

Crooked Kingdom
Six of Crows
Yellow Brick War
The Wicked Will Rise
Charm & Strange
Their Fractured Light
These Broken Stars
NOS4A2
NOS4A2
Big Little Lies
I'll Be There
Red Queen


Stefani's favorite books »

Thursday, June 25, 2009

27 Week Update...


How far along? 27 weeks... I actually had to go double check because it's going by so fast I wasn't sure!

Maternity clothes? Yes

Stretch marks? Nope - but I'm watching for them!

Sleep: I'm still tired all the time (whoever claimed you got "energy" in the second trimester was full of crap). I've been sleeping okay, but I'm too hot all the time and I have to pee 3 or 4 times a night.
Best moment this week: Finally feeling productive - I have a clean house, a weeded yard, I got some work done, and I've worked out every day...

Movement: Every day and every night... she's getting way stronger!

Food cravings: Fried Mozzarella Sticks.

Gender: GIRL!!

Belly Button: Flat - which looks really strange!

Labor Signs: None

What I miss: Horseback Riding

What I am looking forward to: My parents being here this weekend!!

Weekly Wisdom: Break up all your chores into little pieces and do one thing each day - don't try to clean the whole house or weed the whole yard in one day.
Milestones: I'm in my last week of the second trimester!!

*Weight Update: I don't post this weekly because it's depressing - but I'm up a total of 28 pounds - from 125 to 153. I've averaged about a pound a week so I'm guessing by the end I'll be around 40 pounds heavier. Gulp. Doctor says I'm good so I'm not stressing out too much - just walking and working out (arms and legs) every day, doing water aerobics three times a week, and *trying* to watch what I eat.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Land of Nod ain't got nuthin' on me...

One of the things I've wanted to do in the nursery since we found out we were expecting, was have my baby's name up on the wall. I had a cut out from a magazine that I loved and as soon as we knew we were having a girl and picked her name - I was off to the races online looking at name letters. I ran into two very annoying problems. First, anything that I thought was cute enough to buy was going to cost me $20 per letter. I'm not a fan of nicknames and I refused to do just her initials so I moved on because $140 in letters would be stupid even if we weren't broke. Then I started looking at plain letters (no design, no color, BORING) and got depressed. I found some on sale at Craft Warehouse and bought them, even though I had no idea what I was going to do to "girly" them up. Then, a few weeks later, I was perusing the Land of Nod catalog and saw the wall letters they had to offer. The colors weren't right for Addison's room and they were made of cardboard instead of wood but it planted a little seed in my brain. I drug Derek back to the craft store to get some scrap booking paper in our colors, some Mod Podge (the coolest craft product EVER made) and some pink glitter. A few hours, and quite a mess later, we have unique wall letters that match the color scheme of the room. Two of them required minor touch ups as the paper didn't appreciate being wet but I'm not telling what letters they are and unless you show up to inspect them for yourselves, I don't think you'll be able to tell. :)




Monday, June 22, 2009

In spite of my gardening difficulties...

I did manage to accomplish ONE thing so far today... I found and booked a pediatrician. This is no small feat considering most pediatric practices in our area are not taking new patients and I don't trust my family doctor as far as I can throw him (yet I still go there... hmmmm.) so I'm happy to say that we have a doctor for baby Addison and I have an appointment with her on August 5th to meet her and pick her brain.

Now, if I could just get off my butt and either shower or make lunch I'd be doing alright today...

I'm too fat to do yardwork...

::sigh::

I have a list. If you know me, you know that I LIVE by lists and that being able to accomplish something and cross it off is on par with getting sparkly gifts for no reason at all. My summer was supposed to be about accomplishing the grand "to do" list. I was going to break it up, work on a project a week, and then ::presto change-o:: by the end of summer - all of my projects would be done and I'd be ready for baby to arrive. My lofty goal this week was to tear out two shrubs in the front flowerbed that I HATE and get that area ready for some replacements and to organize the garage. I started plucking these shrubs last week but realized they were more deeply rooted than I had originally thought and pawned off the chore on Derek. He pulled and sprayed them and all that was left (in theory) was to dig out the root ball and pull the remaining stragglers. So, I went for my walk, worked out, cleaned our bedroom and bathroom (Derek has demanded that I start cleaning one room a day instead of going for my marathon cleaning on Fridays because I get so worn out), watched Regis and Kelly and then headed out to tackle these two, supposedly dead, harmless plants. Fifteen minutes later I knew I was in trouble. I *think* I got one root ball out but only after heaving and pulling, loosing my grip and toppling over backwards. Then, I tried to get up to move to the other bush and realized that with my screwy center of gravity and nothing to grab onto - I was going to have a helluva time getting up. I'm sure the neighbors across the street were amused but after some grunting and rocking, I managed to get myself back onto my feet. I stood and stared at the second bush for a while and then, defeated, headed into the house. On the way, I stopped to look around the garage - which was going to be my master project for the week - and realized that I can no longer move the things that need to be moved in order to clean. So, I'm 0 for 2 already and it's not even noon. I'm starting to see that my bigger projects may not happen or I'll have to bribe Derek to do them (he has his own, even bigger list he's already working on) for me...

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Buckle up kids... this could be a long one...

For the past 8 hours Derek and I have been sitting in very uncomfortable chairs learning all there is to know about childbirth. I figured this was one of those times where it would be good to sit down, write out what I'm thinking, and get it all out... My jumbled thoughts may not make complete sense to anyone not currently residing in my brain but the purpose of this blog is simply to process all the information that is rattling around in my cranium...

I doubt it comes as a surprise that labor and delivery are weighing heavily on my mind lately. We have somewhere in the ballpark of 13 weeks to go and I really don't have a "plan" in my mind of how I'd like things to happen. Obviously I want to have a safe, short labor and deliver a healthy baby but there is a lot more that goes into it... I have never claimed to be brave enough or strong enough to want a natural birth. Anyone who knows me, knows that I don't handle pain well - I throw up, I pass out, I panic... it's ugly. So, from the beginning, I have wanted pain medication. My problem has come in choosing that particular form of medication. The first "level" of pain meds that are offered are given through an I.V. and are narcotics. I've had enough narcotics in my life to know that they make me feel woozy, sick to my tummy, sleepy, and they really don't do anything to help me deal with pain. Add to that the fact that they make the baby woozy too and you can't have them during the hour before you deliver and it makes narcotics easy to cross off the list. The next step (and the one I wanted all along) is a "walking epidural". It's still a spinal, but it's a lower dose and you can walk and move around during labor. You still have some sensation and feeling but it's cut WAY back. The problem is, after talking with my doctor, that they wear off and sometimes don't work properly so our hospital doesn't do them. That leaves a full epidural as my last option. It would numb me pretty much completely but I would be confined to the bed, on my back, hooked up to a whole host of machines and wires - a blood pressure cuff, oxygen monitor, catheter, uterine monitor, fetal monitor... the list goes on. All of that weighs into my decision but the thing that worries me the most is the feeling of being helpless and paralyzed in the bed. I have anxiety issues (big ones) and I can't imagine feeling okay with the idea that I'm totally at the mercy of strangers (other than Derek) while I'm so vulnerable and exposed. That thought horrifies me almost as much as the idea of natural birth...

Continuing on with horrifying ideas... the idea of having a c-section is the scariest complication about childbirth. With my malformed uterus the chances of baby staying breech or transverse are pretty high. At my last appointment, Dr. H told me that as we got down to the wire we would do an ultrasound to check baby's position. If she's head down, then we're good to go for a vaginal delivery... which is my goal. But if she stays in her current position then we schedule a c-section. I know that there are a lot of scary reasons to have a c-section and that having a scheduled one isn't nearly as bad as some things that could go wrong but I still really, REALLY don't want one. It's not even the fact that it's major surgery - I get that and I understand that I'll be sore and that there are a whole list of complications to go along with it, but that isn't what bothers me about the procedure. It's the idea that my first act of motherhood is something that I am unable to do. It screams "failure" to me. All through high school and college I imagined having kids and secretly prayed for a c-section delivery so I could escape the uncomfortable and unattractive aspects of labor. But now that I'm married and pregnant I want that experience more than anything. I want to feel contractions, to work through it with Derek and have his support, I was us to drive to the hospital on an unexpected day, and I want him to hold my hand as I push her out and bring her into the world - there is nothing I want more than to have that experience. I feel like anything less than that would be cheating me out of my rite of passage into motherhood.

Somehow, if I survive all that - I have the whole idea of postpartum depression... I've dealt with anxiety and depression since I was a teenager and I know that I'm susceptible to have trouble with postpartum. I went off my antidepressants just before getting pregnant and things have gone okay so far but I worry that with stress, lack of sleep, and a brand new baby to take care of that I might get overwhelmed and have to go back onto the meds. I don't have a problem with the meds but I worry that I'll wait too long to go on them and that the first few months of motherhood will be clouded by depression.

I have thought about so much of this - laying awake at night going over every possibility - and I realize that much of it is out of my control and my struggles will be more in responding to these things rather than choosing them. Pregnancy and the idea of birth are so new and unlike anything else I have ever experience and for much of it, I feel like I don't really have anyone who I can confide in who has been through it and understands the fear and apprehension that goes along with so much of it. Derek is the best support person I could ask for and I know that in the end he won't let anything bad happen to me but I hate going into it with so many unknowns. It may not sound like it, but I really do feel more prepared after taking this class and I have a list of things that I need to discuss at my next appointment. Now that I have sprewed all that onto my blog - I'm going to try to make something good for dinner, watch a few episodes of Weeds, and get some sleep... maybe tomorrow I'll have all the answers.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

26 Weeks...

This is my new hair color/cut... I was talking when Derek took the picture so sorry for the goofy smirk...
How far along? 26 weeks
Maternity clothes? Yes
Stretch marks? Still none, not that I want any... but I do have enough cellulite to keep my butt warm for the next decade... ::pouts::
Sleep: I got my snoogle pillow and I LOVE IT!!! We were out of town for a week so sleep was hit and miss but the last two nights at home have been great...
Best moment this week: Celebrating our fifth wedding anniversary in Seattle...
Movement: Every day and every night... she's getting way stronger!
Food cravings: Reeses Peanut Butter Cups...
Gender: GIRL!!
Labor Signs: None
What I miss: Eating whatever I want and not gaining weight...
What I am looking forward to: Finishing some of the biggies on our big to do list...
Weekly Wisdom: EXERCISE.
Milestones: Double digits!!! Only 98 days to go!

Skyla rushed in to give me a belly kiss at the last second... :)

Double Digits!!!

Holy wow... only 98 days to go!!

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Five Years....

Wow... time really does fly. Five years ago I was 22, newly married, and on a cruise in the Mexican Gulf... Now, I'm living in a home we own, pregnant with our first baby, and still (thankfully) happily married... Derek and I decided we needed to get away for our big day, not only because it was our anniversary, but also because it's the last time the two of us will really get a vacation alone for a while... we deliberated about going to the coast (too long of a drive and too cold this early in the summer) and going to Lake Chelan (spendy and not a lot to do for a preggie)... in the end, we settled on Seattle - we decided to shop, eat, and sight see at our own pace, so Friday morning we loaded the car (I don't travel any lighter now that I'm pregnant, much to our bellhops dismay) and headed West. We stopped in E'burg for lunch at the Pita Pit and started our five days of restaurant binge eating. By North Bend I had to pee again and we had been alerted to some baby sales at the outlet mall... we raided Baby Gap and Carters and made out like bandits... Derek found a couple pairs of shoes and I looked longingly at the Coach store but managed not to go inside (BIG kudos for me!)... After we had shopped out the mall we decided to get to the hotel - we stayed at the Westin in downtown Seattle. We told them we were celebrating our anniversary and they gave us a great room on the 40th floor with a view of the space needle and Lake Union. It was amazing!!




After we got settled in the room, we decided to go down to the pool for a pre-dinner swim... if I had known how much I would be eating in the next 72 hours I would have swam for a few hours!! After about 45 minutes we headed back to the room to get our showers and get ready for dinner. At 6pm a car came from the Palisades to pick us up and take us to dinner. I wish I would have taken some pictures inside the restaurant, it's beautiful and it sits right on the marina looking out at the water and downtown Seattle. We had a great view and a great meal (although, I have to admit, the food can't compare to Tony's here in town - but it was still yummy!) We stuffed ourselves beyond belief and ordered dessert to eat back at the room... we were back in the town car around 8pm and headed back to the hotel. We ate dessert and watched the sunset and then, like clockwork - I was asleep by sundown...

The next day, we got up and had breakfast and headed off to wander downtown. We shopped allllll day :) We had lunch at PF Changs and then went to watch "The Hangover" which was hysterical. After the movie, we headed back to the hotel to change and get ready for dinner (more eating!) and wandered over to the Cheesecake Factory. The wait was almost an hour but we managed to grab a seat at the bar after only a few minutes. We had dinner, ordered our cheesecake to go, and walked (okay, waddled) back to the hotel...
The next morning we hit Starbucks for breakfast and then packed up and headed South to Tacoma. We stopped at the Babies R Us at South Center mall to register for baby shower gifts and then proceeded to get completely lost on the backside of Auburn. Finally, we made our way back to the I-5 and made our way to Tacoma. We checked in to the hotel and got ourselves settled. Hotel Murano is one of my favorites because it's modeled after Murano, Italy. There is blown and stained glass all throughout the hotel and each floor has it's own theme. Ours (this time) was a glass corset...




We didn't do much Sunday evening - just headed to The Rock for pizza and to watch the NBA finals. We went back to the room and decided to order a movie... and it was AWFUL. Do NOT watch The Watchmen - it sucks butt. After suffering through the movie, I clonked out and got the best sleep of our trip...

On Monday we ran up to the Tacoma Mall to return a watch that I bought (it broke... within 3 hours of buying it.) Then we parked the car at the hotel and wandered downtown to check out the little shops and the glass museum. The museum was pretty cool - as we walked across the bridge we got to see over 2,000 pieces of glass work done by Chihuly (he's a famous glassy-guy) and we snapped a few pics. Then we went into the museum and watch them make blown glass art.















On our way back to the hotel, we discovered that the court house had a bunch of Chihuly glass in it as well, so we wandered in and snapped a few pictures - the lighting wasn't so good but it was a beautiful building...



After we got back to the hotel, we got ready for dinner and waited for Derek's friend Mike to arrive... the three of us went out to dinner at The Ram on the waterfront and (again) gorged ourselves... Afterwards, the boys had some drinks and I took a hot bath and went to bed early... The next morning, Derek and Mike headed off to their class at the Fort Lewis Clubhouse and I headed off to the spa... :D I had my hair colored, highlighted, and cut at Sublime salon - it was amazing (and expensive, but worth it...) After two hours at the salon, I wandered back to the Savi Day Spa (at the hotel)... I had an hour long pregnancy massage (heavenly) and a 90 minute facial which was to die for... I had so much fun but I think we're both glad to be home and back to our normal routine... I can't wait to see where life takes us in the next five years!

Thursday, June 11, 2009

25 Weeks...

How far along? 25 weeks
Maternity clothes? Yes
Stretch marks? Still none, not that I want any...
Sleep: Better this week but I ordered a "Snoogle" pillow and I'm very, very excited for it to arrive - 4 pillows is getting to be ridonkulous in our queen sized bed!
Best moment this week: Being DONE with work for the summer!
Movement: Pretty much every day, I still haven't felt a roll yet, just kicks.
Food cravings: I haven't really craved much this week... just normal food.
Gender: GIRL!!
Labor Signs: None
What I miss: Having "normal" conversations - it seems like everything always turns to talk about the pregnancy.
What I am looking forward to: 2 1/2 glorious months off...
Weekly Wisdom: There is a light at the end of the tunnel - I've reached it with work and it's not too far off with this pregnancy.
Milestones: I scheduled my last monthly appointment - after July 13th we move to every three weeks, then every two, then weekly!

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

School's out for summer!!

And not a moment too soon... Tomorrow I'm going in to work for a half day and then it's my intention to stay out of the school until mid-August... I need a break so badly and I could never actually finish anything there because every time I start a new project, it opens up a million new things to do!! So - tomorrow is it... Yay!!

Monday, June 8, 2009

Wait... what??

I had my monthly check-up today and all is good. Addison's heartbeat was 152 and I was measuring right on schedule. I did, however, get a raised eyebrow from the nurse at my 5 pound weight gain this month... I'm doing the best I can - it's not like I'm eating cake and cheeseburgers everyday (not EVERY day :) Oh well... skinny nurse can kiss my cellulite-riddled ass.

I had a point to this blog and it wasn't actually about weight...

My doctor told me to come back in a month for my check-up (on Derek's birthday:) but then after that I go back in 3 weeks, then 2, then weekly!! I can't believe how fast this is going - it's amazing (and kind of scary...). Every once in while it sinks in that in a few short months (three!!) we're going to be parents!!

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Pregnancy + Swimsuit = Low Self-Esteem

But even though I dreaded (there isn't a strong enough word) putting on that damn swimsuit today, once I was in the water (and out of the wind) I did feel quite sea-creature-like. That's not to say that there weren't a few "AH!" moments along the way - changing in a public locker room when your gut sticks out so far that you can't see you own toes is not a good way to start the morning... but I made it to the pool and once I got in and got moving it actually felt pretty good. We did our little aerobics routine for about an hour (I added to the workout by fighting with my ill-fitting swimsuit the whole time) and when we hauled our butts out of the pool, I really did feel like I actually got a workout. I have to go 12 more times to make the $59 price tag worth it, but as the weather gets nicer and as summer drags on with nothing fun for me to do - I doubt that'll be a problem.

Now I need a snack... :p

Thursday, June 4, 2009

24 Week Update


How far along? 24 weeks

Maternity clothes? Yes

Stretch marks? Still none, not that I want any...

Sleep: Oi vey... not great this week, but I think it's because I've been sick. I've had to sleep with a towel rolled up under my low back and one on the left side of my spine where my rib is killing me. Add to that the fact that my feet have been insanely hot at night and I've been putting a cold rag on them and you will see that sleeping has not gone well lately...

Best moment this week: There really haven't been any great moments, I've had the flu.

Movement: Pretty much every day, I still haven't felt a roll yet, just kicks.

Food cravings: None - I've barely been able to keep food down this week, nothing sounds good.

Gender: GIRL!!

Labor Signs: None

What I miss: Being able to reach my toes... I tried to cut my toenails the other day and about died.

What I am looking forward to: SUMMER VACATION IN 5 DAYS!!!!

Weekly Wisdom: Drink lots of fluids... you'll feel even worse without them!

Milestones: 6 months pregnant today... and 150 pounds... ::double gulp::

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

I'd like an IV with a side of cherry popsicle, please...

Yesterday started out crappy - I must have turned my alarm off in my sleep because 20 minutes after I was supposed to be up, Derek woke me and I hurried off to the shower. I felt sick but I thought it was because I went from a dead slumber to a million miles an hour in 3.2 seconds but as the day wore on I started feeling worse and worse. I called for a sub just before lunch and headed home, praying that I wouldn't puke all over myself before I got there. I walked in the door, set my stuff down, changed clothes, walked into the bathroom... and puked my guts out. Afterwards, I tried sipping on some water but that all came back up too. My fever wasn't horrific, only 100.5, but I felt like crap. I tried to sleep it off but when Derek got home he insisted I take some Tylenol for the fever and try to drink some Gatorade... I kept it down for about 15 minutes but then it all came back up. So, got our stuff and headed to Memorial (I had called earlier and they said if I couldn't keep liquids down, I needed to come in). We got there around 6pm and got set up in a room. They hooked me up to a fetal monitor and a uterine monitor and we listened to Addison rockin' and rollin' around - obviously not please with the state of my uterus. I think she was hot and thirsty and having something clamped down on her really pissed her off. It took about two hours to get hooked up to an IV, we got there just after shift change and apparently 6 women had come in all at once and all of them were in labor. Once they got the IV in, the nurse fed me a Popsicle (she's my hero for that small gesture) and left me to absorb the meds and fluids. I drained that bag and since I really didn't have to pee, she decided to hook me up to another bag. I drained that one too... and still didn't have to pee. Apparently, I was a tad dehydrated. At 11pm, she unhooked me and sent us home. We were both thankful because neither one of us was very comfortable - the hospital bed almost killed my back and Derek couldn't lay out on the couch because he's too long... I slept until about 11am this morning and so far, I'm feeling better. I've been drinking my Gatorade and had some toast and so far (fingers crossed) it's all stayed down. There is never a dull moment in this house... that's for sure.

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