I guess mama said there'd be days like this...

I'm sorry - I know this is going to come off as a "woe is me" post but I'm just having one of *those* days...

1. Work. It's almost the end of the year and about 70% of my kids have totally checked out. They don't listen, they don't do their work, some of them even don't bother showing up. I've had a raging headache for two days and being at work today made it much, much worse. I just found out that I can't take maternity leave when I was planning because then I'll be a week over on FLMA, so I have to work right up until my due date instead of taking the week before off. I'm meeting with the insurance people tomorrow to figure it all out, but my glorious plan doesn't look like it's going to work out after all.

2. Ouch. My doctor appointment was supposed to be this afternoon. I was going to get a glorious back adjustment, put my out of place rib back where it belongs, and unjam my butt-bone. But the doctor was an hour and a half behind and I couldn't sit in that office... so I go back Monday. Until then, I have to walk like a gimp and be miserable when I try and sleep.

3. My lovely appearance. It's kind of hard to get up, do my hair and make up, and look for something cute to wear, when I still feel this unattractive. I am very disproportionate and my skin is doing bizarre things lately. It didn't help that a co-worker came up behind me today, grabbed my sides, and exclaimed, "This hasn't always been here!" Thank you dear coworker, I hadn't noticed I was turning into a heffer. I like looking pregnant - I just wish people would quit assuming that all my flabby parts are now up for discussion and gropes.

4. Insecurities. I don't know what else to call this... I guess there is just a lot on my plate and I feel a little overwhelmed. We're already registering for birthing classes and our first one is May 27! I am SO not ready for that yet. Add to that the fact that Derek doesn't see the need to attend any but the birthing class and I'm a mini (or not so mini, according to co worker) panic attack waiting to happen. My parents are leaving for half the summer and I always assumed (yes I know what that means) that they'd be right here with me the whole time... I can only go over the mountains until mid July and then I get grounded because I have to be within an hour of my doctor in case I go into labor early. So that means either no shower with my side of the family, or a very early one before mom and dad go out of town. And THAT means I have to get registered soon, which is another thing I haven't taken the time to do... 40 weeks sounded like a really long time in January... now that we're almost halfway there, it's starting to feel a whole lot shorter! I guess it's sinking in that I'm supposed to birth this child - which involves a lot of uncomfortable things that I haven't totally come to terms with yet.

Sorry for sulking... I'm off to make dinner...