Pondering Potty

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Addison is 2 1/2. For quite a while now, we've been semi-potty training her - putting her in 'big girl' panties on the weekend, talking about going on the potty, making a million trips to the bathroom when she tells us she has to go... and we're still only batting about 500. It's not a matter of not understanding, she is well aware of what the potty is for and when to go - it's a matter of it not really being a big deal to her. If she's not busy, sure she'll announce that it's time to go, but if she's engrossed in a show or playing in her kitchen, it's a lost cause.

Derek was inspired to do the 'big girl' panties routine with her today because yesterday she played all day with a friend (who is the same age) and is recently potty trained. All morning I listened to Derek and Addi playing, running to the potty, and then going back to playing... but this afternoon she had accident, after accident, after accident - on the couch, in her room, in our room... and although she told us after the fact, it was of course, too late.

Derek and I have differing opinions on potty training. I believe that everybody learns eventually and that pretty soon she'll realize it's 'baby-like' to go in a diaper and she'll want to do it on her own. I also believe that forcing the issue is just begging for more stress on her part and on ours. This child works according to her own timeline and I don't know that any amount of bribery, punishment, or routine will change that.

Derek, on the other hand, is frustrated and wants her out of diapers - sooner rather than later. However, once she had several accidents today he vented his frustration and said that since she 'knows' when she's going (she spread her legs and semi-squatted when she peed on our floor today) that she needs to be punished when she has an accident. I don't know if he's right or wrong - while I agree that she does know that she's going and that she SHOULD be going on the potty, I don't think that punishment is going to get us anywhere.

It's not like anybody gets to adulthood (let alone kindergarten) and isn't potty trained, right?? This is another one of those items I wish was included in the elusive parent handbook... I'd love to quit spending the money on diapers, especially considering Cohen will be here in a few weeks and our diaper budget will double, but I also want to keep some sanity in this house - Addison's and ours... Any thoughts?